Wednesday, October 1, 2008

stay together for the kids

Here is an excerpt from a really awesome article:

Separation Anxiety: It’s a National Epidemic, So Why Do Couples Continue to Divorce?
"Having watched all four seasons of Intervention, I find myself fascinated by the common denominators among addicts. In most cases, the addict has suffered a severe trauma sometime in his life, and three such traumas surface more than the rest. The first two are sexual molestation and close proximity to a killing...But perhaps the most common trauma experienced by the show’s addicts is divorce..."

If you're intrigued, you'll find the rest of this article in Salvo magazine. Salvo is a really great magazine by the way.

1 comment:

Megan Schell said...

Wow, incredible article. I think my sister is its poster child, unfortunately. I think the section that hit me hardest was:

"We talk about “starter marriages” just as we do “starter homes.” For many, “until death do us part” is a pleasant ceremonial accessory, a tradition without much meaning. I can recall a news story about how Japanese couples want “Western” weddings because they like the style. I wonder whether we are similar in our desires. We like the form of the Western wedding, but not the substance. We speak vows, but who takes them seriously? And do any of us really care about the lives being ruined by our inability to make lasting commitments?"

My best friend for over a decade is in a divorce right now and the advice her husband (who left her) was given was to leave now for the sake of the children (who are 1 and 2.5) if he isn't "happy". It's amazing to me. He has a girlfriend already and they are already looking to move in together. I just don't understand the logic and I really don't have an answer that seems do-able except to continue to start with our youngest listeners and teach them the values we are so quickly abandoning. The hope of every generation I suppose is that the next one will be better than the last.

Thanks for sharing.